i feel like the last month has lasted years. extreme highs and lows. my first look into one of my best friend’s beautiful life in california. my first funeral.
one thing that has really been in my heart this month is the meaning of the word family. now most times family means those tied by blood or a last name. i have realized that for me, that has never been the meaning of family.
i have some of the fondest memories sitting anywhere in the world surrounded by my closest friends and never felt more at home. and also sadly, memories sitting in rooms full of people tied to me by blood and felt as if we were nearly strangers. it is no ones fault, just the way our life circumstances have turned out.
i am rarely a jealous person, but seeing families who have all grown up together in the same place gives me a taste of envy. having aunts, uncles, cousins, and godparents as your closest friends, first on your party invitation list, and fighting for seats at graduation has never even been a thought in my mind. good or bad, living so far apart was just the way life goes.
at my special occasions and sporting events i had my 3 parents and my brother- which have become my rock. as well as my best friends who are the family i was blessed enough to find.
but that tinge of jealously lingers and is a part of my life that i am attempting to change. i think it is important that my relatives become a bigger part of my life. so i’m working on it.
i also wouldn’t trade the fact that in my darkest hour or brightest victories i have surrounded myself with a family that has been created from people who have come into my life. they mean the world to me and are there every step of the way.
at the end of the day, no matter who they are, your family is your support system. it is an integral part of life. they lift you up when all the strength is gone. they are your biggest fans in every shining moment. i cannot believe how lucky i am to have such amazing people in my life. your kind words and smiles mean so much.
i don’t tell you all enough that i love you. and i do, so dearly. thank you
love, home is where the heart is